What Does it Mean to Be a Woman? {Guest Post}

April 6, 2016

As a mom to three girls, I spend a lot of time thinking about raising girls, what that means and if I'm doing a good job. Our culture is tough on girls, and I want to do everything I can to help them to grow into women who are strong and kind. That's why I love today's guest post from Jenny Hill, who brings such wisdom and insight into her reflections on what it means to be a woman. Here's more from Jenny:

There I was, sitting at my kitchen table in front of my laptop. The sun was streaming in through my sliding glass door, and I’m sure there was a glass of something cold and refreshing sweating on the table beside me. I was listening to Beth Moore preach like I do every summer as I dive into one of her Bible studies on my own. There she was, with her beautiful big hair, impossibly high heels, and charming sense of humor. She was roaming her audience, touching the arms of some of her listeners, talking about the joy of her ministry, when suddenly she exclaimed, “I just love women!”

I remember that moment, as if the thought just ran across my brain yesterday. I sat back in my chair, paused, and thought, Do I even know what it means to be a woman? I’m 32 and I’ve never been on a second date. My days don’t revolve around homemaking, meal planning, soccer practice, and homework. My wardrobe does have a fair amount of pink and purple, I love accessories, and I’m enamored with shoes, but I also have mild cerebral palsy. It impacts how I move, how I’m perceived, and it definitely means no high heels. I think all of this begs the question: What does it mean to be a woman when you are single, childless, and flat-footed? I’ve been pondering this question for a while; most intently over the past month. Here’s what I see:

No heels? Then find a signature accessory! 

In heaven, I hope I’m going to have a closet of heels. I want to stare at my beautiful feet for ages, run around in them with abandon, and stand up and lead worship before God, pouring out all of my soul before the throne. But until then, I wear headbands. It started with a feather attached to a headband, and has expanded to include flowers, and gems, more feathers, and sequins. They disguise bad hair days and have been the topic of intriguing conversations more than once. I think we all have a certain unique style that just needs to be discovered and expressed.

Single? Know you are loved! 

Honestly, I find singleness very challenging. I recognize that I may have more flexibility with my time than my married and parenting friends, but I’m lonelier than I’d like to be. Online dating works for some, but it is no magic pill, no sure solution. There are days where singleness seems unresolvable, bleak, and very long. It’s in these times I’ve needed to realize that married or single, I AM LOVED. We all need to realize this. God loves us like a playful child, joyfully chasing us in a game of tag. He pursues us with boundless energy and delight. God also loves us like a good friend. On our hardest days, when companionship seems so far out of reach, God takes us by the hand, lovingly looks into our eyes and says, I’m going to walk with you every step of the way.

No children of your own? Open yourself up to nurturing. 

My strongest love language is touch, and while my little nephew doesn’t always want hugs and kisses, he’s never said no to a foot rub. Sometimes I run the wheels of his Lightning McQueen over and over his soles, other times I take his socks off and rub his sweet little toesies between my fingers. He usually quiets and his eyes stare off, filled with contentment. There is a wealth of love inside each one of us that we can give to others; the invitation is simply in finding the right place to invest it.

Jenny Hill (@Bibliophile84) has been recognized on WCCO TV for her work as an elementary school library media specialist. She is currently pursuing a Doctorate of Education from Bethel University, St. Paul, Minn. Jenny lives in central Minnesota. Her first book, Walking with Tension, is currently available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle versions. Read more from Jenny on her blog or contact her at walkingwithtension@gmail.com.

Are you looking for more resources? Have you checked out our books?
Our newest book, 100 Daily Acts of Friendship for Girls, is written specifically for girls ages 8-12 as they navigate friendships in upper elementary and middle school. With a scripture, short story, reflection questions and 50 fun activities to do with you or friends, it's a wonderful way to encourage your daughter, niece, granddaughter, God daughter and her friends to build healthy friendships from an early age.

And our adult friendship devotional, The One Year Daily Acts of Friendship is a perfect compliment to our book for tweens. With a daily scripture, story, and friendship prompt, its encouraging and slightly challenging (in a good way!) as you find, keep, and love your friends.   

We've also written two kindness devotionals, The One Year Daily Acts of Kindness and 100 Days of Kindness. They tell the story of how our families embarked on a one-year journey of kindness, and include our successes, failures, and the encouragement you need as a family to incorporate kindness into your own life.

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We're in this together,

Julie, Kendra, and Kristin

Today we are once again linking up with Holley Gerth and Jennifer Dukes Lee.


  1. Super, Jenny - all of this was great which makes me think you have much more behind those signature headbands. I love that thought, too - find your signature piece (and heels are not all they are cracked up to be...) Single myself til 35, I've known your Saturday nights and Sunday afternoons, and telling God I'd like Him to be enough but I'm just not feeling it. thanks for sharing - next to Ruth Exp(Yea!) this morning in CA at tellhisstory (which you did beautifully)

    1. Thank you Sue for acknowledging the feeling that comes with Saturday nights and Sunday afternoons for a single lady. I'm so glad to know that God IS enough even when we don't feel it!

  2. Jenny, what lovely thoughts! It is so easy to compare ourselves to others (I can't wear those high heels any more and I miss them!), instead of rejoicing in the here and now where God has us. Thanks for a great reminder! I was your neighbor at Holly's "Coffee for Your Heart." Blessings!

  3. Blessings to you too Donna! Thanks for reading!