I Didn't Ask For This Season of Rest.

November 18, 2013

This past spring was busy. Too busy. As I hurried from day to day, trying to get all my lists done but always lagging a bit behind, I felt God calling me to let some things go. Step down from some groups and ministries I enjoyed. At first I balked, not wanting to stop. But as spring went on and I found myself pregnant and dealing with nausea most days, I began to crave rest.
Photo by Adam Pniak on Flickr.

So I did it. I let go of some of my “busyness.” Determined to rest. Believing that was what God was calling me to do. And I felt good about it.

The summer went by with a lot of time spent doing kids’ activities and family trips, spending time together. It was wonderful. And I didn’t really notice what I’d lost.

But then this fall came. The kids went back to school. I had more time at home -- more time to myself. And I began to feel like I needed those things back. I dropped my son off at preschool, the same place a group of women were meeting to plan for an organization that I loved, one I’d been part of and then let go in the spring.

And I left feeling sad. Unsure. Is this really what God has for me?

As I lay in bed that afternoon, worn out from cleaning our rental property the day before, I realized how hard this season of rest is for me. That for as much as we say rest is good and wouldn’t we all like a little more down time, a quieter season in life, most of us never really stop to do it. Myself included.

Because for this woman who likes to: Go. Be. Do. It’s been hard to simply: Stop. Wait. Rest.

In a culture that values busyness, involvement, leadership, I’ve always been active. I thrive on activity, engagement, achievement. It’s easy to pride ourselves on all the activities that take up our time throughout the day, all the ways we are busy, all the things we are doing.

And although there is nothing wrong with these things in and of themselves, when taken to extreme, they can be the death of me. Of us.

Of the quietness that God often calls us to. Of rest.

“Be still, and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10 It calls to me.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28 It beckons me.

I don’t know how long this season will last. And it is a struggle getting comfortable with it. But more than anything, I do not want to miss what God has for me in this moment. This time. So I am going to choose this season of rest, trusting that God knows better than I what is ahead. How I may need this time to face what is next.

What kind of season do you find yourself in right now? Can you be comfortable with where God has you?

1 comment

  1. I don't know why we, as a society, value obsessive busyness, but we do. I struggle with putting too much on my schedule. This was an excellent reminder for me. Thank you.